Night fall is when New York comes alive and the city is at its best. Billboard and building lights shine so bright you’d never guess the sun was missing. The streets were jammed packed with children of the night who were loud and full of energy ready to party the night away. This is the city that never sleeps and watches everyone who steps foot in its concrete jungle and sucks them in. However, during this summer night, the city was surprisingly quiet and peaceful. Only a handful of people were out and about and cars zoomed by but didn’t make a sound. It was eerie, like the world came to a halt and felt Renee’s rage.
Like a queen, Renee sat on her throne and looked out at all of New York from her terrace. Her Manhattan penthouse supplied her with the view she needed to marvel over what was hers. Her eyes danced across the sky then made its way down to the very streets she flooded with coke. Renee entered a game labeled “boys only” and took it over with ease. Her rage and emotionless soul made it capable for her to enter a man’s game and conquer it without apology or regret, but tonight it wasn’t about that, tonight the betrayal she felt didn’t come from the streets but from home.
Her slender fingers wrapped around her pinnacle and cranberry so tight it was bound to shatter. Renee looked into the night and wondered where the one man she gave her heart to was. Ever since she revealed to Julian three days prior that she aborted their child he cut off all forms of communication with her. He didn’t take her calls, come by, text, or face time her. The way he cut her off you’d think they had no history whatsoever. Renee drunk the last of her Pinnacle and poured herself another glass of vodka minus the cranberry juice and took it to the head. Liquor had always been her best friend through college. The more Julian ignored her, the more anger surged through her and ripped her soul apart. Life wasn’t fair, it was cruel and hurtful and all Renee could ask was why?
Yes she aborted their child without his knowledge, but what she didn’t understand was why he was throwing such a tantrum. On many occasions Renee had voiced that she didn’t want kids. She wasn’t mother material and knew it. Renee attended meetings with her connect, not teachers. She flooded the streets of New York with the purest coke the state has ever seen and no child deserved to have a callous, queen pin as a mother. Motherhood entailed warmth and selflessness, things Renee didn’t possess. She lost those good qualities a long time ago and in the words of Omarion has an ice box where her heart used to be. So why act like she could be Clair Huxtable when she knew she couldn’t. Julian knew all of this including the fact that Renee’s a selfish individual who only showed interest in herself. So why be surprised that she had an abortion?
Renee abandoned her glass and started to drink the vodka from the bottle. She thought about how true the saying “it’s lonely at the top” really was. Although she was cruel and insensitive she cared for Julian, he was there for her when the rest of the world walked out and remained loyal to her throughout the years which is why his disappearance left a bitter taste in her mouth. She drunk the last of the vodka and stood up to get a better view of the city. She looked far out into Manhattan until she could see nothing but buildings and darkness. She ran her fingers through her hair like a comb, she was losing her mind, but her pride wouldn’t allow her to break down and feel the pain she was really feeling. She would sleep in an empty bed that night and even though she would never admit or acknowledge it that’s what scared her most. A lone tear threatened to fall from her eyes but she fought against it, no tear had touched her cheeks in ten years and they weren’t about to now. So she stood there frozen in place while her blood ran cold and her nails dug into the railing.
He’ll be back, was all she thought.